Shock and disbelief

What would you do if you were expecting a 1-2hr surgery but ended up being operated upon for 5hours?

Shock and disbelief?

I had 3 endometriotic cyst in my ovary. They were growing inside each other, one big one has a medium one inside it while the medium one has a small one inside it. All these were INSIDE the ovary. My surgeon had to slowly peel out each layer and reconstruct back the ovary after draining out the endometriotic blood inside through a key hole surgery.

He also discovered the reason why I'm feeling so much abdominal pain during my mentration on my right abdomen. It was because the fallopian tube was also filled with endometriotic blood and it was adhering to the underlying skin of the abdomen, instead of being a free floating tube. Each time there are strong abdominal movements for mentral contractions, instead of being able to have free-flowing muscular contractions, the tube tags hard at my abdominal walls making it extremely painful.

Even my uterus had problems, there were polyps filling it up which he had to clean out, the menstral blood was also eating INTO the uterus walls swelling it into unnatural size. My surgeon removed part of the swollen uterus and reconstructed it back into an appropriate size and shape.

All these done through key-hole surgery aka laproscopy.

Besides great admiration for his skills, I'm very grateful towards him for saving me. Giving me the ability to even dream of one day having our own children.

But I was truly shocked at the extend of damages inside my own body which i've failed to protect and keep in good condition.

I was wondering if the recent mood swings were a result of the immense amount of menstral blood inside me? Or was it because i was grieving so much about my dad that caused so much damages to my system?

I would never know.