Feeling the heat

After my last jab, doc say the longer I dun get menses the better, it means the effects of the jab is able to last longer, meaning more effective in defeating the evil endometriosis condition.

Since then, I've been having HOT Flushes daily even hourly. This incredibly warm feeling comes and goes at its will, causing me to feel immensely hot for a few mins and having to yank off my fleece jacket in my chilly lab and then a few mins later, when the flushes disappear, I have to slip the fleece back on again! so troublesome.

And yes, I'm getting alot more snappy too! :( poor hubby, he's suffering the "effects" of the jab besides myself.

Hopefully all this will go away in a few months, the dilemma, you dun want it to go away very very soon because you hope that the effects of the drugs stay on making it more effective towards the condition, but you dun really enjoy its stay because of the disruption to my life. hmm...

Also, I feel so out of the norm with myself, I'm having thoughts and mindset of perhaps what I would be in another 30yrs time! The menopausal me wont be fun-loving, cheerful and outgoing I can tell.

I've "evolved" in this time to become someone I dun really recognise, I cannot relate words to my feelings, mind goes blank and have absolutely no idea why I'm standing in the kitchen or going towards the study. Its definitely not fun nor funny, if all women lives like that after 50, what's the meaning to it all?

I sense that my thoughts are more centered about myself and me only, I have to forcefully get my mind OFF myself and distract myself. Its a tough and tedious process and I wonder how long can one do that, especially when you ARE actually 50-60yrs old, surrounded by grouchy oldies who only grumble and lament about the negativities. Got 20yrs to plan how to prevent that from happening to me haha